A Dull Head

My mind has been pretty blank lately.




Last week in particular i felt i could best describe how my mind felt as "dull".



My sleep pattern was completely out of whack and for the entire week i basically did fuck all. My mind was heavy but silent and all i could bring myself to do was put on tracksuit bottoms, no socks, and plod down to the laptop and read a gazzilion things on the web.





It was pretty shite really. However work was fine. It was a busy night so i couldn't complain.



I also loved the doctor who finale, although it now means i have very little left on tv to look forward to, it being the off season that is summer.



I hate the summer dip in quality tv. There is no justification for it, other than theoretical good weather, and supposed people living in said possible weather. What about us no-lifers? Why betray us? Give us entertainment, we'll watch, we promise!



Well there is summer blockbusters but the schedule is backed this year, and confusing. Twilight is the next big one, but in the states several others are already out, but not here? This makes film blogs confusing and annoying because movies get spoiled before I/we have a chance to see them.





Some movies at least have International release's, Twilight:Eclipse and Predators being the next two big releases, with Inception later in the month, and Avatar: The Last Airbender (unrelated to Avatar, but then again it could help this Nickelodeon Anime Adaptation from M. Night Sham-of-an-excuse-for-a-directer-after-the-village-lady-in-the-water-and-the-happening....)





Strangely Toy Story 3 is STILL not out here in Ireland, or the UK. It's out in the US and Australia, but not here? What fresh hell is this? I want to see it now!





In other news i'm slowly trying to repair and catch up with friendships and i may or may not discuss this at some stage.



I also applied for a film Course in Ballyfermot, and emailed them asking what the requirements for their application Portfolio were. I doubt i'll get in etc, and today is the deadline for Changing CAO applications. Over the past few months i've gotten loads of letters from the places i applied to, but for the most part i doubt i'll get to go to any

of them.



Even if i have the points, i don't have the money. So far i'm only working 1 day a week, it's slowly dawning on me that this is laughable despite having saved up to 100 euro all of my own, and bought a piss-poor notebook. With a proper, 5 day a week job i'd have a hell of a lot more money, and freedom, and excuse for a life than i do now.



But ye know, it's so hard to find stuff that it's not even worth trying. If anything, with everyone saying there's nothing out there, me thinks there's a gap of defeatism in the work force that can be exploited. Ie it is actually worth trying, because so many others think it's so bad that they shouldn't even try looking, or think they can't find anything. Or is it a covert conspiracy to make everyone else not look for work so they themselves can get it?



After insistence of my dad i filled an online form out for the new 500 Terminal 2 jobs in Dublin airport. It turns out so have around 9,000 other people! I don't stand a chance with the amount of qualified or experienced people desperate for a job.



What i'd most like to do with my summer is make my amateur film. But i don't know if i'll get around to it. Although if it's a requirement for the Ballyfermot thing it might motivate me. After all, i have a physical interview just for applying! So there's a chance i could get it, and a great incentive to do it as well!





Upcoming posts:



Due to my dull head over the past week or so, some ideas came to me, others left fast.



But i did slowly start writing a continuation of the music meme posts, but in soul spilling essay style, so that could take a while.



Also over the past few days i did a lot of walking in my local area and took photo's too. I found a ruined Church and an abandoned house. I also tried to find my way up to a mysterious tower that's not on any map, but it's hard to find!



From the 3 locations i could see it from i figured out a rough area of where it is, and i hope to reach it soon, and figure out what it is. It looks like a church tower, or a monastery. It however is not prominent in the landscape and it is unmarked on all the maps i can find. It's a spooky mystery i can't wait to solve.





For now toodles.