Schweet

Amazingly blogger is sluggishly accessable on my inq phone. I saw public enemies with ds this evening after my placement ended. Self reward and all that. It does mean i will miss torchwood as im still sitting in Amiens street station.

I'm Gooooofy for Gooooooogle.

I've said it before and i'll say it again, i use A LOT of google things.

Picasa for my Photos.

Picasa web albums for photo hosting for my Google Blogger Blogs.

Google Chrome For internet use, althout it taxes my current computer a bit.

Blogger, obviously.

Gmail for College Emails.

Google Talk For College Email's and Society Friends.

Google Desktop was tested on my computer but it took up to much memory...

Youtube, cause who doesn't???

Google Maps /Google Earth

I have and unused Orkut account.

And i recently switched to reading blogs on Google Reader for conveiniance and organisation of my Reading fix.

Google Product's i hope to use in the future, because Google seem's to be a evil power i freely would buy into:

Google Wave - To reveloutionise the way i communicate, duh!

Google Latitude - To make cyber stalking me and my friends easier, if i needed to.

GoogleVoice - To have a phone number that can call ANY of my phone's from the same number depending on who's calling me.

Google's All For Good - A Local Area Charity and community search service for being involved with google users near-by who don't spend their whole life using google tools.

Google Chrome OS for Notebooks: In 2010 or so if i have money i'm getting a Notebook with google's OS, cause i would love to have it!

Basically i know google is basically the new Microsoft. But face it. Microsoft, got soft in recent years. Other people are just better than them, Apple beat them at office and music work, they also beat them at Mp3 players. Google Beat them at search engine's, and now has it's own browser and zillions of other tools. After all Gmail is hugely popular, although the Lapdog of Microsoft's quick buy's, Hotmail is probably the biggest Email provider after the like's of Yahoo.

Google is possibly a big evil corporation. But it has nice idea's, is very friendly, is slightly hippie like, is very useful and damn it they provide a lot of "open source" things, what ever that means!

Long may they enslave our live's! Cause i'll love 'em for the white sheen they bring.

Physical exhaustion and a bit ansy.

Is life Jim..... but Nursing is physically demanding shit!

Wow, 3 day's down, 1 and .8 to go. Or whatever the friday's worth.

I am exhausted. My shoe's, are not the may west, so the sole's of my feet are aching, my ankles have scabby ulcers and even my calluses are throbbing. I ache all over, i'm generally tired and intermittently sluggish. And my moods change very frequently. This is the price i pay for a massive increase in physical activity coupled with lack of sleep. It's a shock to my unfit system and it's nay fun i can tell you that.

My rash is still semi-present. My hands have been washed so many times, and rubbed with alcohol gel so often that the skin is visibly dry and bath wrinkles are appearing. I try to moisturise them but it doesn't help when you wash it off minutes later. My rash has run and hid on my hands and feet. This means as well as the swelling soreness of standing on my feet in small tight shoe's all day, i also have a constant nagging itch that i can't scratch in any way. It's only small red spots but it's a constant burrowing itch that just won't fuck off.

I'm showering every day, but the physical activity and this mild humid weather means i'm sweating a lot, and i usually don't sweat. This means i'm getting chaffing around the groin from pool's of sweat. This is possibly one of the worst as it's the one that i notice most while at home.

As for my mood, it can be circumstantial. I was relatively happy with my nursing actions today. It was quiet, "touch wood", and not much had to be done. This meant i got everything i needed to do done. Fluid balance's, a couple of walks of the patients, so on and so forth. I even had time to loosely pre-pare for whenever my cpc would come around.

This involved a quick scribble of the basic's i knew she would ask me about. But i was busy and walking up and down with a slight limb, throbbing feet, sweating my ass off and generally knackered. I didn't have the time to look after all the patients i was assisting in the care of and also learn. When i was home the night before i wasn't arsed. i was too tired. MJ's memorial made my eye's well up and Torchwood was nice escapism. I had few hours of sleep and rest to recuperate, studying was not on my agenda. So when then CPC did finally catch me, in the middle of a task at that i wasn't exactly happy.

I was trying to get a patients weight. The first weight i got was grossly underweight and obviously wrong. She then asked what it was in Imperial, and so did a nosey former Nun in the next bed. As they chatted about that i kept trying to amend the result and get it again. But the damn scales wouldn't switch back to Metric. And i was stuck with senseless weights, in the sense of what i was looking for. Stone's are all well for conversation but they're fucking useless for medical purpose's. I failed to get it. My CPC arrived mid task and started to chat to the Nun. Fed up and aware i was basically being summoned and watched i stopped and put the lady back into bed.

I was then brought to talk about what i had "studied". Here came the shit part. I'm not stupid. Okay, yes, i failed exam's for second year twice but that's lack of study and emotional failure's such as being a fuck-wit selfish twat who only Care's about self-pity. But when on placement i do what's asked of me and generally get by well enough. I was on-top of a lot of things today. I was almost on a roll, apart from a large spillage early in the morning. I was dreading the cpc, i was tired and exhausted from actual work. I didnt expect this time owing to include being expected to self-educate to the same standard. Obviously that is not so.

So being put on the spot. I struggled to string a sentence together. I was pissed not only with the idea of being pulled aside for inquisitive learning, but i was even more pissed that i couldn't even talk. I actually stuttered. I know this stuff, the words may not be perfect, it's not clear in my head, but i don't see myself as thick or anything. It may be an over-confidence in what i may know but when i Stuttered and couldn't say what i knew i SHOULD KNOW, and expected that i could talk about i just stammered and fell short of my intended words. It was beyond frustrating. It was unbearable. I just wanted to blurt it all out in academically perfect explanations. I wanted to look at the notepad in my hand with the answers. But i was all over the place. I couldn't even say the words my eyes snatched quickly.

I then had to read through the software guide to explain it all i was still flummoxed and stammering. It was on the screen. I rolled my eyes and squirmed every time her eyes weren't on me. I checked the clock in the corner of the screen every time i could.

I was trying to talk about Pressure sores and the assessment tool's and so on. Frankly even when i do encounter them it's second nature to use the various treatments we use. Such as barrier cream's, positioning, pressure relieving cushions and mattress, diet, hydration and so on. We do that as basic care as it is. Actually summoning up the rationale was escaping me. And for someone who usually over thinks and drifts off on trains of thought, not being able to express what i knew or could say was just awful.

I was so focused on all my physical demands and physical pain that i couldn't kick my brain into gear and catch up. My higher functions we going no further than what had to be done.

It may be trying to excuse my inept and glaring failing, but i just was NOT in the mood to dredge out education and knowledge when i couldnt even say the words articulately or at all.

Yes i am far behind of where i should be. Let's face it, after 3 years i really am worse at this than i should be. I got lazy, i became complacent, i became indifferent and cock sure of my own abilities, which is a lack-there-off. My academic rationale is seriously lacking. This is due to a large lacking in work. My physical care is usually hap-hazard and messy.

Basically i don't think i really am of the right mind set most of the time to be a Nurse. I'm a walking disaster. I may be a caring person but i am to all over the place to do anything competently. I, knowing myself, would not trust ME to care for ME. Not at my current level. I really wouldn't.

In my pissed off state i just smiled and agreed with the rest of what the cpc said. Trying to get rid of her. But then came a fact of documentation and care that is a glaring omission of how bad it really is within our health service. We are meant to "Think Discharge". From the second someone comes into us we have to have a minimal idea of how they will be managed after they are with us and so on. Well ALL of my patients were post surgeries and varying stages. And out of 6 only one had a mention of Convalescence and discharge in the near-by future. 1 out of 6.

My CPC quoted an audit of a ward of 25 where only 4 had preliminary plan's for discharge. We only started talking about it when all issue's are generally resolved and taken care of. Once people are generally well then we start planning discharge as the last few tasks like additional scans or removal's of drains and dressings and so on. Most of ours it wasn't mentioned, and considering how fucking busy we were for just a "QUIET" day it was fucking woeful how little i really knew about the over-all picture of our patients. I know i'm not the nurse but most of what i did was tasks, tasks, tasks.

No big picture. No Care Plan. No documentation past Vital Signs, Input and Output/fluid balance and stool charts. I've been doing that for 3 years. The clerical stuff has been intermittent at best because the nurse's, my preceptor's are always doing that as i do the tasks for them and us as a team. That is a glaring sign of my lack of assertiveness in showing that i am very far behind on knowing or having any experience with the clerical side of nursing.

Celebtastic:

Soon We Bury The 2nd King.

It is a staple of human society that once and a while someone great come's along. Someone so special that they eclipse all others. They are a jack of all trade's and capable of anything. From Gospel we are told of Jesus Of Nazareth, From history we know of Issac Newton and Shakespeare, From science we know of Edison and Einstein, from Politics and civil rights we know of John F. Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, Doctor Martin Luther King Junior and Nelson Mandela, and from film we know of Charlie Chaplin, James Dean and Marlin Brando.

From the World of Music we know Of Elvis Presley, and Michael Jackson.

I have to say a few words here and there. I welled up at the footage of his memorial yesterday. I cried when His brother sang Charlie Chaplin's Smile. I especially cried when his daughter said her first public words.

That memorial may have been a show worthy of Michael Jackson, but it will also live in Infamy. Hundreds of millions of people worldwide watched in unison the passing of a Legend.

On The Box:

I'm currently loving TORCHWOOD.

The first episode was great fun. The second a bit weak and contrived, tamely just another episode despite it's dark undertone's.

Tonight however was just amazing. It all came together. The slow and never full reveal of the 456 was well done. The use of a "middleman" to absolve world leader's of culpability is a great plot point. And the terrifying use of children, and request for 10% of them is brilliantly played out.

Jack's involvement in their last visit is a great twist, and i can't wait to see where it goes. I hope it doesn't go down hill from here. Dr Who would. It's in it's nature in recent years, to give a soppy cop out that the children can buy. Torchwood is less forgiving. They did after all kill off 2 permanent characters at the end of their second season. The less said of their Dr Who cross-over the better.

I'm loving it and can wait for tomorrow's episode, but i don't want to.

P.S Stuff came out in my nursing rant that i didn't even realise. I think it shows how therapeutic and helpful just writing this blog can be.

Oh Oo! Ee Gast and all that jazz.

Ah fucking porch monkey's, yes i'm bringing it back, i have placement tomorrow.

Yes tomorrow mornign at 450 am i will be rising like a zombie in a Romero film slow, lathargic and cuveting gorry violence to quench my needs to remain un-awake.

I will grumpily blast myself with a shower. Slip my gahstly uniform into a bag, or on me, i can't decide whether to sally my clean clothes and self for a mixed taboo, and then get the 6 am train.

Now this is the first train of the day. And i may have to walk up the very long hill of the Dublin Road in Drogheda. This take's at least 5 minutes on a good healthy day, more if it's the depths of winter and you're too tired.

At around 656am i arrive at Connolly station. I then briskly walk to the Luas, and by a ticket. I sit in the seat that provide's the nearest free metro discarded by some considerete green commuter. I then arrive at the Workhouse at around 724 or so. Walk round about way's from the Rialto stop to the Locker Room then walk the rest of the length of the hospital to the ward i owe time to.

I then work for free, for means of educationa and paying my due's from 730am till 20.00, or as early as i can squeeze off and still put down the relivent time on my document.

I have 42 hours to pay back this week. Yep 42, and i have to have it done by friday. This mean's i will be working every day this week. Although i may need to stay later on thursday and have a shorter day on thursday in order to hand in relivant document's on time. This i'm not sure about, so i'll email about it on tuesday or late on monday.

I am not really looking forward to it, but i have to do it.

I'm in debt for 7 grand and i am working for free as a means of an education at a profession i don't really want to keep or do forever. I really really don't know why. But i have no other choice. I have NEVER worked a day in my life. And that counts for academic work to. This slog of thankless work known as "placement" is all as a means of hands on learning. If i knuckle down over the next 2 months and get to 3rd year, a year late, i will have an entire simester of "placement".

Thank fuck it's nursing, after all even if it's thankless grouling work, everyone's in uniform and about 92% female. THANK FUCK FOR THAT!

A blog full of photo's...

So as i mentioned previously i had a stock pile of idea's and so on that i wanted to stuff into my blog post's over the next few days. That didn't exactly happen and i even left out an intended video from my previous blog.

So to keep up with continuity and to circumvent that fuck up with my facebook feed, this whole post will be dedicated to photo's and a video or two.

Snap Happy:

From Blogger Pictures

This is the Sprite that was magically Coke from last Saturday.

From Blogger Pictures

This is the door of "Exchange Dublin" on Sunday morning.

From Blogger Pictures

This is an interesting bit of graffiti from "shag alley" behind the George and beside Dublin Castle.

This is my product testing of the NEW Jolt Flavours that have finally arrived here in Ireland. They've had these for years in the states but a clerical technicality left the Koln and Netherlands plants still producing the classic Jolt Cola in it's olde plastic bottle.

From Blogger Pictures

From Blogger Pictures

From Blogger Pictures

I have yet to try the red one. They are VERY expensive as it is. The cheapest i've found them is about 2.60. The first red one i found was 3.99. Insane considering the normal 500ml plastic bottle is 1.50 and the tall can's about .99 to 1.20 or so.

And just for it's lusty goodness here's the origional:

From Blogging

From Blogger Pictures

A funny sticker covering the normal sign's on the luas.

Q-Rated:

Now i mentioned my new mp3/mp4 player before. It is a bargin i have to say, spatious, and handy.

However i payed for what i got. It's supposidly worth $80 but i got it for €35.

Now it wasn't easy getting music onto it. iTunes only detect's iPods. Winamp crashed, Realplayer crashed. doubleTwist which is meant for any device, also appeared to crash, and is useless at sorting music. So i resorted to Windows media player. Yay it worked, although the music tags were a bit off... I then disconnected the device, but i didn't do it properly. Hence i fucked up the machine. So after that my dad had to access it using command prompt and delete everything from there and use changelog and all these things i don't understand to get rid of crazy non-existant buggy files that spread across the inside of my mp3 player. It was a bitch basically. Then eventually we fixed it and all was good.

So I started to put all my music, or most of my music on it. Some 11 gb or so. I had to leave it running over night.

Then it wouldnt disconnect from my computer. In fear i would fuck it up again i didn't know what to do. So eventually i turned the computer off, and it worked fine.

However... The music is VERY poorly tagged. And the player on the device is awful. It doesn't shuffle. It claims it does but it doesn't, or for some odd reason shuffles the odd track here and there. It's annoying. And it take's forever to scroll trough the music. I got what i payed for, or rather what my dad payed for.

It also doesn't have the best battery life, it doesnt seem to have a proper stand-by like the iPod. So if you want to turn it off for a while, it's best to shut it off all together. Oh well, it's spacious, carries files, play's videos, plays music despite a piss poor player and it's nice lookin' who care's if it's a cheap pile of shite!

From Blogger Pictures

Video Kill's:

In a promised video posting i'll give y'all this. Possibly one of Wacko Jacko's best songs. I barely knew it at all, since it was never played on MTV in my youth, back when they played video's, and it wasn't really on the radio. I think i might have known it from a double tape of HISTORY that i had but with Tape's you usually just listened to one side or both if you had a player that would flip it for you, switching seemed pointless in those days.

So enjoy Man in The Mirror:

So goodbye for now.

pink lemonade and muddy pawprints

It's life Jim....but those damn puppies just don't know it!

Oh grown. I woke up early, ie a proper time, 830, to let the dogs out of their cage. It rained over night, it was overcast and wet. Hence the dogs wouldn't hop out the door while i stood in the gravel yard waiting for them. So i went in and fed them. The minute my back was turned one of them peed in the corner. So mop out clean, clean, clean. Then within an hour the floor was covered in manic muddy paw prints. LARGE MOPPING!

And now there's stains again and the floor needs a good hovering. It just won't end, and i couldn't be arsed doing it just yet.

I also saw a lot of property porn this morning. Yes it is porn. No one should watch that much housing in one morning unless they're a post man or a burglar. Seriously, in a more serious way than grey's anatomy, who really can afford to be a property developer? Or to have the "house doctor" come around. At least 3 house show's within as many hours, and not the good kind, ie NOT House M.D. This is just cruel scheduling. There's a credit crunch for feck sake! Who wants to see a developer miss out on a profit by a month and have to settle for inflated renting then sell a nice little gable end terrace house. NOT ME! After all i live within my own mess as it is, literally and figuratively. So why is it that all these shows are still going on? DO the brits really love their home's this much? Or are they really so greedy that they have to dream of buying home's so they can do them up and sell them to others? What a waste.

PS Bargain Hunt is on now. And another bitch fest from that yank on House Doctor. If only she was a real doctor, she'd prescribe pastel colours and smarmy backhanded compliments. Fucking yanks.

CINEPHILLIA:

Just over a week ago i went to see Terminator Salvation. Now i was going to give a more comprehensive and canon-aware review of the movie and it's place in the Terminator saga. But then i got distracted and lazy and so i will just say a shorter mediocre few comments on it.

It's entertaining. It's thick and fast and down right stupid. The new Machine's are menacing and fun, but they pass to quickly and just aren't the same. There's not as many lasers as the flash-forwards of the previous movies, a real pitty. But we do have a lot of new toys. We also have a non-sensicle very quick and predictable plot. It's a leave your brain at the ticket box sort of movie. A MASSIVE shame compared to the techno-warning of the classic original. Not only that but T2: Judgement Day was almost a horror movie that attempted to deal with "temporal mechanic's" at the same time of pushing CGI technology to the limit. A ground breaking classic that still kicks ass. T3: Rise of the Machines, now it's a mixed bag. It's fun, it make's less sense than it's classic predecessor's but it ends with a bang. The TX wasn't as cold as the T-1000 or Arnies original but she did pack a fair few massive punches. The T-1's and mini-Hunter Killer as her minions was fun. AND THAT FIRETRUCK CHASE! Just wow, destruction un-rivaled. And the end was a great morale dilemma. Judgement day would always happen. Such a great finale.

T4 however is such a slap in the face. It's to fast, full of to many shiny new toys that are wasted. And the lo-tech but not so apocalyptic future is just annoying. A-10 tank buster airplane's just don't make sense in the post apocalyptic future, i can forgive the submarine but an Osprey as well? Please spare me. I was disappointed. There was a good few nods at the past movies, a good "arnie" cameo and a lot of familiar quotable lines. But no NEW line's you'd quote again. Bale was flat and in-affective. And the "main character" he wasn't very believable. His accent fluctuated wildly and he just wasn't very likable as the Death-row inmate trying to make people love him and his massive mutant cyborg heart.

Result: 3 stars. XXX

War movie classic's:

Now while doing my dvd wander thing with DS last Thursday i brought up this question:

What is the best war movie, set and made in the 20th century?

His first answer was Cold Mountain, as a joke, so i added the other clause's.

I then gave him the answer. Glory. Stanley Kubrick's master piece and understated classic. I first saw it in "flim club" in school and have loved it ever since. World War 1's atrocities and horror played out by the execution of innocent soldiers for "desertion" following a failed and flawed attack on a pointless target. Amazingly moving and it's not the execution that make's you cry and weep like a baby no. That is a manly tear moment. It's the last scene however that would destroy even the hardiest of men. A German Milkmaid is forced to sing songs for rowdy french soldiers. Soon they all sush as they realise she's got a great pair of pipes. Her stressed, tearful singing with a terrified luck carries a moving tune that slowly pulls the soldiers in. Close ups show every soldier slowly remember home, remember their sweethearts and weep for their losses. It's a greatly moving scene that will leave you scrambling for hankies. Brilliant.

But the true great that i forgot....

The best war movie based on pure fictional entertainment and gun hoe action:

WHERE EAGLE'S DARE

Just imagine the theme tune now, dun dun dun, de de de, dun dun dun....

Or Quote it: "Broadsword calling Danny boy, come in Danny Boy"

Then remember that this crazy movie involves, espoinage, wholesome and willing Bavarian double-agent beauties, Nazi's, a kick ass mountain castle, a Richard Burton tour de force in british swagger and elocution and Clint eastwood mowing down nazi's with infinite ammo. You can't ask for more from a war-actioner. It's one of the greatest loads of shite ever made, and in a good way!

It's a father and son movie, it's a lads movie, it's even a filmbuff and thespian movie! To combine great conspiracies and acting with a pointless action vehicle with such grace and style.

If you haven't seen this movie then you should hang your head in shame. You won't regret it, it's just to darn fun!

Abandonia:

So i forged on and eventually played Civili(z)ation IV again. And i have to say i'm sort of disappointed this time. My computer isn't exactly up to the task of handling it, but it's just slow/fast. I've already reached the 18th century and i don't even have an army capable of waging war. It requires so much more micro-management that it consumes all of your time and you get fuck all done. Now i love a lot of it's new system's. The civic's and religion feature's are amazing, but their potential isn't realised. Not only that but the speed at which the years pass. It's a problem with a lot of civili(z)ation game's, but it all pass's far to quickly. It's better when you spend several hour's with the same level of technology and build an army in each era worthy of a long struggle and/or brief wars. I would like it if the game's reflected periods of history and you could actually raise armies fitting for those times. Unfortunately it can not be.

Civili(z)ation 2: Test of Time:

I mentioned it before, and i tried to get back to the game's i had played before. No such luck.

The first save game got put in the wrong folder, the ordinary civ 2 folder. Thus when i moved it back to the right place it wouldn't open it.

I then started a new game, and it went well. A few days later i attempted to open it again, oh oo, big glitch. Instead of loading with the dark palate landscape and animated units, it loaded the OLD units on a mixed and fractured background. The glitch was grotesque and unexplained. I saved it properly. It was a save game for this game. But for some unknown reason it loaded the graphics in a crazy way and now i couldn't play it because of how ugly it was.

So i started a newer game late last night. I hope that when i get back to it later today it will actually work. But the hassle of those failed save games is annoying.

Lounge Athlete:

Federer is just about to play Tommy Haas so i will keep this brief.

Murry Mania may be short lived as he face's Andy Roddick in the semi-final today. It will be a marathon match and one to look forward to.

It's Federer who get's the relative cake walk and VERY certain match. Haas may be good but i sincerely doubt he has the where-with-all to get the good points and beat the style grace and shear talent of Federer.

Andy Vs Andy will be the real good match of today. And i can not wait for it!

Turning a new metaphore...

So the date came and went. Examblor rear it's ugly head.

And i have to say it wasn't so bad. 1 more exam failed. So the tally is now as follows.

2 Exams that i have to resit

An assignment i have to have handed in by august 31st or some such

And the placement i fucked up on has to be done next week.

So with a lot of early starts and groveling that will be out of the way next week. Thank fuck for that. I stood nervously speaking with deliberate elocution almost shouting into my phone's speaker phone when talking to the relevant office and apologising. I was trying to control a nervous stutter and remain clear and audible while being terrified of not only the responsibility of owning up to being a selfish ignorant fuck wit, but also doing anything that i should be doing ie fixing my own mess!

So next week i'll have 450 am starts and will be re-doning my tunic to take care of people for free and supposedly get an education. Glory be and all that. It's the height of summer. Okay i have no job, i'm poor at delegating with friends but feck. This mess of my own making really is inconvenient. You'd think after years of avoiding thing's i'd learn a lesson or something. All i've learnt is how to make shit worse.

I've put my parents 7 grand in debt. I have to repeat my exams, in my repeat year, and i missed the time owing i should have payed back when they were on holiday. I really have a talent for fucking up and being self-centred and self-affacing and all other self things.

I received my results in an email mere minutes before i was due to go into town to go and get them. Knowing my results i still went into town.

I then checked them in their hard copy format on the notice board when i got into D'Olier Street.

I then saw a few face's here and there, my old year and my current. One easy one to spot was purple face. I call her this because of her hysteric reaction on failing last september. Or whenever it was, the week before they guaranteed Irish debt for 4 generation's if my memory serves right. She was very upset and so on. Lucky for me, i had parent's who put far too much faith in me and gave me a repeat year via a credit union loan.

Interesting since that whole morning me and my father were driving in the rain listening to the economic gloom of the government announcement of that insane and inane "guarantee". So after a few quick emails the decision was made to repeat instead of the obvious disaster of "off books". So i got my second chance. Purple face didn't have that. She went off books, as far as i could tell. And by the look of her reaction nearly a year later, she still didn't do to well. Shame, pity, so on and so forth.

Considering i have squandered this year. Considering i spent most of it developing a "social life" in the form of my connection to the Society. Considering i put a lot of thankless effort into that and then never voted for myself to guarantee a term of office i would either not be able to sit or would have been to busy for. Considering i was still depressed and never fully pulled myself out of a rut enough to study fully and to pass as i was forced to promise. Considering i made the same mistakes again and again, and added new one's.

Considering all that, i still have the last LAST CHANCE. And fuck it i have to work. I'm not emotional. I don't really want to be a nurse forever. If i get this over with i'll branch out instantly. I'll do social work, i'll do charity work, i'll go to the Sudan and get shot for handing out grain; i'll do anything not to wipe an old woman's ass again.

Following receiving my results i sent an email update to my tutor and waited a reply. Seeing this wasn't going to happen i went walking. I was still aching a bit from my Sunday morning stroll in the docklands. But it had given me a spring in my emotion's mere minutes before my results. So i thought for the sake of time wasting and health, keep on walking.

So i went down D'Olier street. Onto Pearse street, around the construction. College green. Trinity campus. Cut through to the art's block. Pass by that cutie who rejected me who never saw me, her mouth a-ghast with large click's of chewing gum. Nassau street. The same beggar in front of the spar. The first news agent's on Grafton street, DAMN that new JOLT stuff is expensive. A price hunt it was. Dame street and back into temple bar at exchange street. Every newsagent's along the way and even a nostalgic look into the grotty café that i had that "lunch" with Cleo. Exchange street. Those kid's and their youth project busy building their space. I walked on, there was more to this area i didn't know. A lane that looks like the one featured on the "VOTE YES" ad's for Lisbon. An art gallery with metal sculpture's of Preditor's and Alien's and one bitchin' Optimus Prime. Wood Quay. Heart of Dubh Linn. A reptile shop, MORE humid than our weather, a cool breeze shock upon leaving. Walk back east along the liffey.

A Czech soldier is asked by local slurred speech skanger local's was he one of "our" boy's back from Chad. Then up Capal street. Many memories. My dad used to park here for shopping on saturday mornings, years ago. We used to have breakfast in Bewley's on Henry street. Now all evidence of it is gone. I tried to look for Bananbar books, but it was long gone. Then i saw the several adult shops, odly open in day time. Memories of possibly the only sex my mind brags about that i had with PG. A wonderful night that included me buying lube, our first successful attempts at anal and 3 great time's so exhausting that i ached for days. More and more newsagent's along the way. Jolt product's are hard to come by. Then i reached the end of Capal street and realised i knew nothing further. To my right was Parnell street, and the Virgin Imax/UGC/Cineworld. My favourite cinema. DS and mines sanctuary of movie education and worship. I'd seen a large road on maps, past this point, not knowing it's name. So i walked there. Bolton street. Ethnic melting pot just like Parnell street, or as i like to think "Chinatown". Gave up on my Jolt price search. Then bought a "Tiger" energy drink in a small bistro/mini-shop. It's ingredient's all in polish. .99 cent and an attractive migrant worker on till, who was i to complain. The next door down, a spar. To my infinite luck, and what i instantly predicted. JOLT was available in this shop. Not just Jolt cola, but all 3 of the new flavours, plus the energy tablets at an extortionate 3.99.

I then walked up a side street. A large gate beckoned. The second i reached it my mother rang. Was told to attempt to contact tutor in person. She asked why i wasn't in "trinity". I said i was waiting. I also said i was on Parnell street, and not "relatively" lost on purpose. My college is D'Olier street as it is, separate campus. My Tutor's office is in Apollo house. It's a monster eye-sore nestled behind the stye that is the Department of Health and Children. Architectural shudder. It was 435pm. Train at 1714 in Dublin Pearse. I walked briskly, with a limb all the way from KIngs Inn's, to Parnell street, O'Connel Street, Abbey Street, The liffey, Tara Street, by Apollo house, read email's on Inq, no response, up pearse street in spitting's of rain, and onto Westland Row at 1703 or so...

Reading on train, on 1984 now. Eventually got phone call while passing between Balbriggan and Gormanston. The Army Artillery Corps were practicing on the coast for some reason. AND HOME.

Not really blogging but rants and explanation's. I'll be back on the wards next week. A lot of chore's tomorrow. Hovering, weed picking, dog feeding and so on. Study also needed. How i'll fit my new books in i don't know. But i will!

Tid bit's some time "today".